Say Yes.
On grey days like today - it’s hard to SAY YES to anything beyond that first coffee. Saying yes is not about feeling pressured to do things you don’t want to do. It’s about learning to override those voices in your head that say no for all the wrong reasons.
Let’s be clear - there is never going to be a perfect time, you’ll never know all the things you think you should and enrolling in another course is not the answer. So shush those negative voices and say YES to new experiences. And while you’re at it stick a wedge in the door to allow serendipity to sneak in.
Serendipity (serənˈdɪpəti) is a word I love!
Cambridge dictionary defines serendipity as finding interesting or valuable things by chance. I prefer Dr Busch's definition of serendipity as smart, active luck as opposed to blind luck that you have no control over.
We can’t control events but we can control how we react to them and if we see the unexpected as an opportunity rather than a source of anxiety we create the environment for serendipity to grow.
In his book The Serendipity Mindset: The Art and Science of Creating Good Luck, Busch talks about the need to be open to the unexpected and learn how to merge apparently random or unconnected ideas together to create something of value.
Saying yes is the first part. Being fully open to the unexpected is the second and having the confidence and quick wit to seize the opportunity is the third.
When you’re trying to figure out your third act, serendipity can play a big role in helping you identify opportunities you didn’t know existed or create new ones by making connections and identifying alternative pathways.
We make opportunities by saying yes to things that sometimes make us comfortable or scared. Talking to strangers in a queue for example or reaching out to someone you admire on LinkedIn.
Asking strangers to sit down for an interview was not something I normally did before The 50:50 Project but I’m so glad I did because, in addition to meeting so many new, amazing people, I’ve learned to think bigger about what is possible and become part of the growing conversation about age and workplace.
Sending “serendipity flares” is another way to invite opportunities and tell people you are open to new experiences. Being helpful is a great way to foster serendipity. Think about what you have to offer. Can you volunteer, lend your expertise to a project or be a sounding board for someone else?
My advice is to do something to get the ball rolling and start the conversation. Don’t worry too much about the final destination if you’re moving in the right direction.
Busch also suggests creating “hooks” as a way to give people more entry points. When you introduce yourself, learn to add a few details that go beyond CV headlines to bring your story to life and make what you do more multifaceted and relatable.
For example, if asked what I do (a question I actually dread) I might say I studied business, retrained a web designer, write a blog about midlife career reinvention and am hoping to write a book as fun and inspirational as Austin Kleon’s Steal Like an Artist - this gives people four potential hooks.
So this month, don’t let the grey and rain stop you from thinking about ways to invite some serendipity into your life. Start with a simple yes.
MARCH ‘SAY YES’ INSPIRATIONS
WATCH
Shonda Rhimes, the powerhouse behind Bridgerton, Grey's Anatomy, Scandal and How to Get Away With Murder talks about her Year of Yes and how she got her mojo back by saying yes to play.
READ
The research behind the serendipity mindset with Christian Busch and learn how to train your own serendipity muscle to turn the unexpected into an opportunity.
CONNECT
Use LinkedIn to expand your network, DM people you’d like to chat with and join in conversations. You’ve got 875 million members from 200 countries at your fingertips so what are you waiting for?
FOB (friends of the blog) updates
For smart, practical and actionable career change advice pick up a copy of Rachel Schofield’s new book The Career Change Guide Five Steps to Finding Your Dream Job.
Emma Stenstrom has also released a new book this month called Bubble Hopping. It talks about the importance of stepping out of our own comfort zones (or so-called bubbles) to hear new perspectives and avoid polarisation.
And big congratulations to Emma Cook who has just had her first novel ‘You Can’t Hurt Me’ acquired by Orion Books. It’s a psychological thriller from about trauma, art, fame, obsession, jealousy, control and pain.
And finally, for some pure joy…
Go see David Hockney’s new show Bigger and Closer at the Lightroom.
The Guardian panned it and so did The Evening Standard but I stand with The Independent and give it 5 stars. In the last few years, both the Tate and The Royal Academy have put on big Hockney retrospectives so you might be wondering if you really need more Hockney. The answer is Yes.
At 85, David Hockney doesn’t appear to be slowing down or shying away from technology. It’s a mesmerizing and inspiring 50 minutes.
